Write your heart out. Go for broke. Ursula K. Le Guin
There are days I’m tempted to quit writing and go to work at Ann Taylor.
You may have expected me to say J Crew instead of Ann Taylor. Well, J Crew has yet to respond to my request to open a store in Wichita. Better get with the program, Jenna Lyons. Ann’s here and she’s vying to be my go-to store.
Ann Taylor. Pretty clothes. Sweet discount. Sleek space. Well-defined career opportunities.
I can hear the imaginary trolls of Nightmare on Aimee Street. “Yes!” they say. “It’s about time she got a real job.”
Why are they still hanging around anyway? Be gone, oh ye of little faith!
Back to Ann. I could work while the child is in school. Cook fine dinners from Pinterest recipes in the evenings. Sleep normal hours instead of waking up in the middle of the night to plink plink plink away at the keyboard until I’m cross-eyed.
I wouldn’t wonder where this is going, what’s the plan, how will I get there. Wouldn’t need to take a stand on controversial food, social, and cultural issues or dread negative comments. Wouldn’t fear people hating me and my blog because there would be no blog. There would only be Ann.
Ann is a possibility. She hangs like a life jacket on the back wall of my brain.
Until I remember the rush of writing and publishing and facilitating a dialogue. It’s like a throwing a mini party with every post. I can’t get that with Ann.
I can have a pleasant career, a steady paycheck, and very nice clothes with Ann. No shame in that, but it’s not my passion. I can sell dresses with cheerfulness and take joy in the new arrivals each season. But it’s not the thing that makes me sing.
There’s a little stream of stories inside me that hasn’t run dry yet.
God provides. God provides.
What if I just write until it does?
Shall we go for broke, you and I?
What do you say?
And if God cares so wonderfully for wildflowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, He will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith? Matthew 6:30 NLT
Rush for a Change of Atmosphere by Big Audio Dynamite. For M.
Will you go for broke?