Tag Archives: work

Go for Broke?

Write your heart out. Go for broke. Ursula K. Le Guin

Ann Taylor sign

Ann’s here

There are days I’m tempted to quit writing and go to work at Ann Taylor.

You may have expected me to say J Crew instead of Ann Taylor. Well, J Crew has yet to respond to my request to open a store in Wichita. Better get with the program, Jenna Lyons. Ann’s here and she’s vying to be my go-to store.

Ann Taylor. Pretty clothes. Sweet discount. Sleek space. Well-defined career opportunities.

I can hear the imaginary trolls of Nightmare on Aimee Street. “Yes!” they say. “It’s about time she got a real job.”

Why are they still hanging around anyway? Be gone, oh ye of little faith!

Back to Ann. I could work while the child is in school. Cook fine dinners from Pinterest recipes in the evenings. Sleep normal hours instead of waking up in the middle of the night to plink plink plink away at the keyboard until I’m cross-eyed.

I wouldn’t wonder where this is going, what’s the plan, how will I get there. Wouldn’t need to take a stand on controversial food, social, and cultural issues or dread negative comments. Wouldn’t fear people hating me and my blog because there would be no blog. There would only be Ann.

Ann is a possibility. She hangs like a life jacket on the back wall of my brain.

Until I remember the rush of writing and publishing and facilitating a dialogue. It’s like a throwing a mini party with every post. I can’t get that with Ann.

I can have a pleasant career, a steady paycheck, and very nice clothes with Ann. No shame in that, but it’s not my passion. I can sell dresses with cheerfulness and take joy in the new arrivals each season. But it’s not the thing that makes me sing.

no parking no waiting

no parking no waiting

There’s a little stream of stories inside me that hasn’t run dry yet.

God provides. God provides.

What if I just write until it does?

Shall we go for broke, you and I?

What do you say?

And if God cares so wonderfully for wildflowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, He will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith? Matthew 6:30 NLT

Rush for a Change of Atmosphere by Big Audio Dynamite. For M.

Will you go for broke?


Filed under blogging, faith, humor, writing & reading

Road Full of Promise

work in progress

My life is one long career counseling session.

I’ve lost count of the tests and books, the hours of discussion, the rabbit trails run to determine what I’m supposed to be when I grow up.

Another career consultation looms today. Part of the relocation package. Help for the uprooted spouse.

I wonder how many people go through this. Figuring out how best to care for your family while also using your abilities to contribute meaningfully and financially with work outside the home.

Meaningfully. Oh, how I’d like to be passionate about my work.

Financially. Oh, how I’d like to be compensated for it.

I’m not much for the process. Just get to the point. Tell me the answer without the ambiguities.

But life’s not like that, is it?

The Israelites stood on the banks of the Jordan River at flood stage, waiting to cross. It had been quite a journey and Moses was dead.

The officers circulated through the camp. They told the people to watch for the ark of the covenant, the symbolic box where God lived. It would lead the way.

road full of promise

“Then you will know which way to go, since you have never been this way before.”

I’ve never been this way before either. Out here in Kansas with nothing but God and ground and sky.

“Keep a distance of about a thousand yards between you and the ark; do not go near it.”

The pastor I heard teach this from Joshua 3 said the ark was far ahead of the people so all of them could see it. The distance symbolized the separation between God and the people’s sin.

Joshua then told the people, “Consecrate yourselves, for tomorrow the Lord will do amazing things among you.”

And God did. That very day He parted the river waters for them to cross.

I don’t follow an ark. Christ’s death and resurrection closes the separation between Him and my sin. He comes near to me. Emmanuel, God with us.

Chin up, buttercup. Keep walking. Who knows what amazing things await?

Then your light will break forth like the dawn,
and your healing will quickly appear;
then your righteousness (or your Righteous One) will go before you,
and the glory of the LORD will be your rear guard. Isaiah 58:8 NIV

Love at first listen. Revel in Head Full of Doubt/Road Full of Promise by Carolina boys The Avett Brothers. Decide what to be and go be it…


Filed under faith, life, women's studies

I Know I’m in Love When I Buy Whole Milk

thank yous unwritten

Except for when we have a showing, my house is upside down these days.

My kindergartner had to remind me to roll down my window when we pulled up to the drive thru at our new Chick-Fil-A.

I’m late delivering copy I promised weeks ago. Even later writing thank you notes from spring break. (If I saw you during spring break, thank you for your hospitality. A proper note will be forthcoming someday.)

I forgot to pay a few bills. Wore the same outfit three times in one week.

Cut my recreational shopping so severely, it no longer qualifies as recreational. It’s now combat. In. Out. Mission accomplished.

Took snapshots of H&M’s naked mannequin and Cabela’s taxidermied bears.

Bought body wash for my son when my shopping list specifically read shampoo. Twice. We have enough to keep him sparkling through third grade.

And I carried whole milk home from the grocery store. Shopping with my eyes closed that time.

This from the woman who made a crusade of cutting calories and fat from our family diet. Who painstakingly racheted us down from whole to two percent and finally to one percent over the course of several months.

the red milk

What a surprise one morning at breakfast when my son said, “Mom, you bought the red milk.” Whole milk is labeled red at our grocery store.

“No, I didn’t,” I said.

“Yes, it’s red.”

“What? Oh, my. It is the red milk!”

We drank the red milk. Then I paid more attention and bought the purple milk on my next mission.

What can I say? I’m in love.

Something has captured my attention. Occupies my mind. Changes the way I see things. Gets me up in the middle of the night.

hearts in a row

It’s a jealous lover. Expects all my time. Truth be told I would really like to let the world go and just swim in it.

And why not? My husband tells me it’s all right to want to spend my time with this. To want to be alive. To enjoy my work again.

Where will this affair will lead?

Right now it doesn’t matter. I’m reveling in the obsession. Hope you are too.

Even so, I have noticed one thing, at least, that is good. It is good for people to eat, drink, and enjoy their work under the sun during the short life God has given them, and to accept their lot in life. Ecclesiastes 5:18 NLT

Diamond Rio, you put it so well in What a Beautiful Mess. Hey, wait a minute. That’s my car…

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Filed under blogging